Sunday, March 22, 2015
Monday, January 3, 2011
First day of school (and some Christmas pics)
Woo hoo! The holidays are OVER! Scrooge (that would be me) is thrilled! Bah humbug. Just kidding. Sort of.
Today was another milestone for Nathan: he started school. He will be attending just ELL classes for 2 or 3 hours each day until we decide what is best for him. The class has about 15 kids in it, in grades K-2, with a teacher and an aide. They appear to be all over the place as far as their grasp of spoken and written English goes. Nathan is probably the oldest child in the class, but a couple of them are as tall as he is, thankfully. There is one other adopted child in the class- a little girl who came home from Ethiopia last July. She is already reading at about first grade level. I sure hope this is the direct result of the ELL teacher's amazing abilities. I stayed for the entire time today, and enjoyed it very much. I would love to work with these kids if I had the time. Though I must say I felt a little panicky as I watched and realized how very far some of these kids, including Nathan, have to go. I well remember this feeling after bringing Trisha and Vania home over 8 years ago. Since things are going so well with both of them in the academic department, I refuse to give into the panic this time!! Yes, it will take time, but he will get there. And if there is one thing I have learned after 15 years of parenthood, it's that academics are not the most important thing in life (though a Nat'l Merit Scholar in the family would be nice...I can still dream...;-)
Nathan seemed to enjoy the class. Afterwards, he gave me a 'thumbs up'. Of course, after we got home, he resorted to his usual 'revving' type behavior that always seems to follow a new experience, a new place, or new people. We are seeing overall improvement in this regard, but we can pretty much predict when there will be an onslaught of annoying or toddler-like behaviors. I am so glad that I can talk on the phone every week with my friend Stacey who is going through the same stuff with her newly adopted son from China. Somehow, I just feel better afterwards!
Nathan handled the holidays SO WELL. I was so proud of him! Especially since we did all the things I would tell any new adoptive parent NOT to do. The hypocrisy! We traveled to Grandma's and stayed 4 days. Nathan met lots of new people, we stayed in a strange house, we went to parties, we ate too much sugar, you get the picture. I knew there would likely be some sort of fallout when we got home, and I was right. Sunday, he was a bear at church- we saw behavior like we hadn't seen in a couple of weeks- rolling around on the floor afterwards, yelling out during the service, getting angry with his brother about a picture he had drawn, running away from us, etc. I realize he is bored and has trouble sitting still, but I even let him have his ipod during church, and he still struggled. He has more trouble there than in any other setting. I feel so discouraged about this, because I desperately want to be able to worship, and it's just impossible right now. Especially since I am usually the only parent there since Drew is in a basketball league that seems to schedule all of his team's games on Sunday morning...grrrrr.
On a happy personal note, I have been able to start up my running training again and hope to get back to my normal daily routine very soon. Amazingly, despite over 2 months of hardly running at all, I seem to be bouncing back quickly into shape. I'm having to really hold back and not do too much, too fast, too soon, for fear of injury. The curse of 47 year old legs (actually, feet are my main problem!) I would so LOVE to go up to the track and just sprint my legs off! Instead, I am carefully plodding miles and rebuilding some base. Which is what I need to do. I just feel so happy and thankful to be running at all, it is such a stress reliever for me and really adds joy and contentment to my life. I am sure some of you think I am NUTS, but I just love to run. I still think indoor track season is a wash for me, but maybe I will be able to compete during outdoors, which would be so GREAT.
Here are a few photos from the last couple weeks.
Today was another milestone for Nathan: he started school. He will be attending just ELL classes for 2 or 3 hours each day until we decide what is best for him. The class has about 15 kids in it, in grades K-2, with a teacher and an aide. They appear to be all over the place as far as their grasp of spoken and written English goes. Nathan is probably the oldest child in the class, but a couple of them are as tall as he is, thankfully. There is one other adopted child in the class- a little girl who came home from Ethiopia last July. She is already reading at about first grade level. I sure hope this is the direct result of the ELL teacher's amazing abilities. I stayed for the entire time today, and enjoyed it very much. I would love to work with these kids if I had the time. Though I must say I felt a little panicky as I watched and realized how very far some of these kids, including Nathan, have to go. I well remember this feeling after bringing Trisha and Vania home over 8 years ago. Since things are going so well with both of them in the academic department, I refuse to give into the panic this time!! Yes, it will take time, but he will get there. And if there is one thing I have learned after 15 years of parenthood, it's that academics are not the most important thing in life (though a Nat'l Merit Scholar in the family would be nice...I can still dream...;-)
Nathan seemed to enjoy the class. Afterwards, he gave me a 'thumbs up'. Of course, after we got home, he resorted to his usual 'revving' type behavior that always seems to follow a new experience, a new place, or new people. We are seeing overall improvement in this regard, but we can pretty much predict when there will be an onslaught of annoying or toddler-like behaviors. I am so glad that I can talk on the phone every week with my friend Stacey who is going through the same stuff with her newly adopted son from China. Somehow, I just feel better afterwards!
Nathan handled the holidays SO WELL. I was so proud of him! Especially since we did all the things I would tell any new adoptive parent NOT to do. The hypocrisy! We traveled to Grandma's and stayed 4 days. Nathan met lots of new people, we stayed in a strange house, we went to parties, we ate too much sugar, you get the picture. I knew there would likely be some sort of fallout when we got home, and I was right. Sunday, he was a bear at church- we saw behavior like we hadn't seen in a couple of weeks- rolling around on the floor afterwards, yelling out during the service, getting angry with his brother about a picture he had drawn, running away from us, etc. I realize he is bored and has trouble sitting still, but I even let him have his ipod during church, and he still struggled. He has more trouble there than in any other setting. I feel so discouraged about this, because I desperately want to be able to worship, and it's just impossible right now. Especially since I am usually the only parent there since Drew is in a basketball league that seems to schedule all of his team's games on Sunday morning...grrrrr.
On a happy personal note, I have been able to start up my running training again and hope to get back to my normal daily routine very soon. Amazingly, despite over 2 months of hardly running at all, I seem to be bouncing back quickly into shape. I'm having to really hold back and not do too much, too fast, too soon, for fear of injury. The curse of 47 year old legs (actually, feet are my main problem!) I would so LOVE to go up to the track and just sprint my legs off! Instead, I am carefully plodding miles and rebuilding some base. Which is what I need to do. I just feel so happy and thankful to be running at all, it is such a stress reliever for me and really adds joy and contentment to my life. I am sure some of you think I am NUTS, but I just love to run. I still think indoor track season is a wash for me, but maybe I will be able to compete during outdoors, which would be so GREAT.
Here are a few photos from the last couple weeks.
Yes, she really wanted a pillowpet.
The whole gang
The chaos. Amazing how it takes about 2 minutes to open all the presents that took hours to wrap!
Our Ohio cousins
Legos
Saturday, December 25, 2010
My first kiss :-)
I got my first kiss from Nathan today. Best Christmas present of the year! (Sorry guys, I love the other presents I got too!) He just came up to me after opening his presents and gave me this quick kiss on the cheek.
To be honest, I didn't know what to expect today. Too much excitement and too many new things SHOULD have brought out the 'wild man' in Nathan, but didn't. We had a really good, calm, happy day. I was a little worried this morning when I came down and the kids said he was acting kind of grumpy and sad and didn't smile when he opened his stocking ( I managed to sleep through that somehow- must be the monstrous amount of sleep deprivation I've suffered for the last 3 weeks!) Anyway, turns out his teeth were bothering him. I hope we make it to January 11 when he gets 2 extractions, a thorough dental cleaning, and 8 fillings, all under general anesthesia.
Things keep improving with our little guy, and with our other kids too. I think the hardest thing for me about adopting a child is the effect it has short term on the kids already in the home. Every time we have added a child to our family, at least one child has been majorly impacted. This time, I have been pleasantly surprised that most of the kids seem to be doing pretty well with their new brother, most of the time. But a couple are still struggling, and it's hard to watch sometimes. I know they will get through this time and we will reach 'the new normal' but I just wish we would get there tomorrow!
I think our social worker compared adoption to a chandelier. The chandelier is the whole family, with each little dangly thing one of the family members. When a new child enters the family, it's as if someone has bumped into the chandelier. The whole thing rocks and sways, and so does each little dangly thing. Gradually, the chandelier and it's individual pieces stop swinging and a new equilibrium has been established. Our chandelier is swinging a little less each day.
Sorry, no Christmas pics yet! Maybe tomorrow. Merry Christmas!
To be honest, I didn't know what to expect today. Too much excitement and too many new things SHOULD have brought out the 'wild man' in Nathan, but didn't. We had a really good, calm, happy day. I was a little worried this morning when I came down and the kids said he was acting kind of grumpy and sad and didn't smile when he opened his stocking ( I managed to sleep through that somehow- must be the monstrous amount of sleep deprivation I've suffered for the last 3 weeks!) Anyway, turns out his teeth were bothering him. I hope we make it to January 11 when he gets 2 extractions, a thorough dental cleaning, and 8 fillings, all under general anesthesia.
Things keep improving with our little guy, and with our other kids too. I think the hardest thing for me about adopting a child is the effect it has short term on the kids already in the home. Every time we have added a child to our family, at least one child has been majorly impacted. This time, I have been pleasantly surprised that most of the kids seem to be doing pretty well with their new brother, most of the time. But a couple are still struggling, and it's hard to watch sometimes. I know they will get through this time and we will reach 'the new normal' but I just wish we would get there tomorrow!
I think our social worker compared adoption to a chandelier. The chandelier is the whole family, with each little dangly thing one of the family members. When a new child enters the family, it's as if someone has bumped into the chandelier. The whole thing rocks and sways, and so does each little dangly thing. Gradually, the chandelier and it's individual pieces stop swinging and a new equilibrium has been established. Our chandelier is swinging a little less each day.
Sorry, no Christmas pics yet! Maybe tomorrow. Merry Christmas!
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Wo ai Mama!
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
OK, so we TRIED...
to get that perfect Christmas photo.
I am guessing that the Auburn fans will not like this one. Sorry, cousins Michael, Keith, and Scott, if you are reading this. Or my neighbors, the Moores.
Sorry I haven't posted lately. Way too much going on. I feel like whining a bit, so I think I'll go ahead and get it over with. Today alone, we lost Josiah's much-loved speech pathologist to another school, I got the blue screen of death on the last sort-of functioning desktop in the house, and our fairly new and expensive basketball hoop blew over in the wind and the backboard cracked and the rim bent...it's basically totalled. Why, oh why, did I not wheel it into the garage? 
We continue to have ups and downs with Nathan, mostly stuff that is oh-so-typical with older adopted kids, but still trying, especially in the middle of holiday season, school and sports events, etc. Sunday, I COULD NOT get him out the door to go to church. Marc was with Drew at a basketball game, and Nathan literally refused to get dressed and go in the car. I knew that if I forced him to go, I would really pay for it while I was there, and I was just too exhausted and beaten down to go there. What would be the point? I understand his refusal to go- he hates riding in the car and gets carsick, and once there, he has no idea what's going on anyway. It's just one big confusing event to him.
I still haven't been able to attend any of Drew's basketball games, either his travel team or his school team's games yet. Both teams are 2-0 so far. I really like to watch him play. Noah has only had one game so far, which I missed. I did get to see Jacob's first game of the season and Grace's debut basketball game. She was awesome for a little pipsqueak! She scored 10 points and her team won, 24-2, I think. Jacob's team did not fare quite so well...next time.
We are going to enroll Nathan in school come the new year. Somehow, my principal managed to get it approved that he would just attend ELL classes for 2 hours a day. I think this will be ideal at first. If he does well, we can gradually lengthen his day. I am hoping being there will motivate him to start speaking English. He is still not using any English. I mean, virtually NONE. He still chatters away in Chinese all day long, doesn't even use words like 'yes' and 'no' in English yet. He will say "Hello" in English. He can't count to 5 in English yet, despite working on it every day. He still doesn't know the 4 colors in the game UNO that we have now been playing for 5 weeks. I am honestly not sure if he knows the names of his siblings yet, except Grace, Josiah, and Jacob. Yet, we see he is quite capable in other ways. He can look at a diagram for the Chinese equivalent of a bionicle and put the thing together without help. Today, in the kitchen, he was helping me clean up and he put all the vegetable scraps in the outer leaf of a cabbage I had sitting there and carried it to the trash. Very tidy! I have been able to do very small amounts of reading with him, working on writing his name, etc, but he is not interested in these things and can't stay focused on these types of activities for more than about 5 minutes. One thing he does like are these Usborne Search and Find books. I have seen him spend as much as an hour hunting for items in these books. He's getting another one for Christmas! My days at home with him are peaceful for the most part- he does quite well when it's just the two of us, or when Josiah is here after he gets home from kindergarten. Today, the two of them were wrestling and laughing for a long time. No one cried, got mad, or got hurt!
He is quite the 'dizzy performer' when in new situations (that's for all you folks reading 'Parenting your Internationally Adopted Child'). I have yet to see him really shut down, he just revs up. We have really tried lying low and staying home most of the time, and this really does help. Most days I don't take him anywhere (not that this has been a problem since it's like 15 degrees outside and windy!) Pretty much every thing outside the home we have gone to has clearly stressed him, as evidenced by his 'dizzy performing' in public. Tonight we had a school holiday program and he had a lot of trouble controlling his behavior, but we got through it.
He has patted several people (like the eye doctor and the dentist) on their stomachs as if to say, "Whoa, what the heck is this?" The girth of many Americans really seems to fascinate him. Yikes. It's hard to not be totally MORTIFIED when this happens!
My running has really taken a backseat lately, and it's killing me! I can still get out and do 5 miles but it's not as easy as it was before we left for China, and I can't believe I'm only getting out 2 or 3 days a week. I have got to make the time somehow, for my own sanity, but there are only so many daylight hours to be had and I just can't leave Nathan in the care of my teen girls for very long at all, certainly not long enough to go out and train properly.
OK, I'm done whining for today!
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Short update
Monday, all the Hunter kids except Nathan went back to school after their long Thanksgiving break. I was not at all sure how this would go, but Nathan has done fine with just boring old Mom around. Today, he had his first visit to the dentist- 5 cavities and some tender gums. He did great overall, though when the dentist found one of his cavities he jumped a bit, and we weren't able to do a thorough cleaning because his gums were so sensitive. We will be consulting a pediatric dentist on Thursday who does sedation dentistry about getting the 2 fillings he really needs and finishing the cleaning since we really can't explain things to him very well, plus I just think it will be better for him that way.
Have I mentioned how much I love our little elementary school? High praise from this former home schooler! Yesterday, Josiah's speech path at school called to see how we were doing (I think Nathan may need her services...) Today, our principal called me at home, after school hours, to see how Nathan was doing and to welcome us home. We had had some long discussions about Nathan's education prior to bringing him home. I am still not sure what is going to work for him, but hopefully we will figure it out by January! Our school doesn't have any other ELL kids so Nathan would go to another school nearby for 2 hours of an ELLclass with kids K-2nd grade and then spend the rest of the day at our school. I really like the ELL teacher and think this mixed age group class would be perfect for him, but I am concerned about him being a student at 2 schools, with so many new people to deal with. Tomorrow, I am going to take him up to our little school to say hello- Grace has been begging me to bring him in, her classmates want to meet him, and our principal is excited to meet him too. I hope we can figure out a plan that works for Nathan so he can be part of the Lincoln community this year but still get some ELL services as well. If any of you BTDT parents have any great suggestions, I'd love to hear them. I would be willing to home school him, but I think he is going to want to go to school. I don't know if we can do a part time thing and gradually transition him, but I think that that would be best. Just don't know if the county will allow it.
Have I mentioned how much I love our little elementary school? High praise from this former home schooler! Yesterday, Josiah's speech path at school called to see how we were doing (I think Nathan may need her services...) Today, our principal called me at home, after school hours, to see how Nathan was doing and to welcome us home. We had had some long discussions about Nathan's education prior to bringing him home. I am still not sure what is going to work for him, but hopefully we will figure it out by January! Our school doesn't have any other ELL kids so Nathan would go to another school nearby for 2 hours of an ELLclass with kids K-2nd grade and then spend the rest of the day at our school. I really like the ELL teacher and think this mixed age group class would be perfect for him, but I am concerned about him being a student at 2 schools, with so many new people to deal with. Tomorrow, I am going to take him up to our little school to say hello- Grace has been begging me to bring him in, her classmates want to meet him, and our principal is excited to meet him too. I hope we can figure out a plan that works for Nathan so he can be part of the Lincoln community this year but still get some ELL services as well. If any of you BTDT parents have any great suggestions, I'd love to hear them. I would be willing to home school him, but I think he is going to want to go to school. I don't know if we can do a part time thing and gradually transition him, but I think that that would be best. Just don't know if the county will allow it.
Much to be thankful for, glad to be reminded of it every year!
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